Been a rough opening for some of our competitors. I saw some great improvements made between weeks 1 and 2, but there were also some questionable moves by a few. I wish that there were spots above first place, because some people did amazing things. I have gotten rid of the point system for everyone except Jakob as I find it hilarious to keep lowering his score.
On to the rankings:
1. Trevor. Previous Rank: 2.
2. Karsten. Previous Rank: 1.
3. Noah. Previous Rank: 3.
4. John. Previous Rank: 4.
5. Jakob. Previous Rank: 5. (-35 points)
6. Tommy. Previous Rank: UR.
Trevor: The one spot is a ranking that I feel could go either way this season, but he locked himself in for this one by coming up to Iowa next weekend. I offer for all of my friends to come and “wild the fuck out” every weekend, but they all have “plans”(READ: girlfriends).
Karsten: Really no reason to put him second other than pettiness on my part.
Noah: Good kid, has quality wins, but not enough offense for me to put him higher. If he starts widening the gap between him and the lower tier competition, he moves up.
John: Great guy. Love him. Need to see more this week to really get a gauge on where we stand.
Jakob: What can I say that hasn’t already been said? Still smells horrible, although his odor has shifted from dog food to wet cat food (worse). Horrible driver. He once stopped the car and the bumper just fell off. If Jakob’s hair gets any darker, I will be 100% sure that he gets it done at Jiffy Lube. Shoutout to my sponsor, Jiffy lube.
Tommy: Called me out for not putting him in the first rankings. BAD move. Called me out for only doing the first week. Horrible move. Tommy doesn’t understand the life of a ranker, and deserves this spot. When he finally quits running his mouth and shows up at my house ready to fight, he may move up a spot. He slots in really good as our anchor here.
Stay tuned for the updated rankings. I did not add a category for most pipe laid, as it wouldn’t be fair.